A story of abuse

My previous post about best ways to respond if your partner is accused of abuse comes with a context. In brief, a former partner of mine has been working very hard to set himself up as a community leader and particularly an expert on abuse and consent issues. This is a problem for me, since I consider our past relationship to have been emotionally abusive, and since he violated me sexually on two occasions. The leaders of a particular organization recently asked me to share my story, which I did, as did several other women who had been abused or assaulted by him in the past. There’s quite a shitstorm brewing about all that right now, which surprised none of us.

One of the other women who came forward, who’s also a dear friend of mine, has posted publicly about her abuse at the hands of this partner and his household. She names names and holds no punches. She does this, in part, because two of the man in question’s partners specifically and publicly asked for details.

I’m undecided whether I want to do the same. I have made my own account privately available to people who asked for it, and may do the same publicly at some point. For the moment, though, I’m just signal-boosting her account, and undersigning that everything she writes is consistent with my experiences and observations of the people in question.

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